Reducing anger can quickly become the number one issue for caregivers because while some individuals with Alzheimer’s or dementia remain content and amiable for the rest of their lives, others can seem as if they’ve experienced a personality transplant. After short-term memory loss, excessive anger, frustration, and even violence may be some of the most notable signs or symptoms of dementia. And, emotional outbursts may exacerbate over time. This is heartbreaking for spouses, family members and loved ones, as well as their immediate caregivers.
5 Tips For Reducing Anger & Aggression In Those With Dementia
Reducing anger and aggressive episode in those with dementia improves quality of life for the patient, as well as those who love them and are involved in their care plan. In cases where anger results in more serious aggression or violence, it is essential for the safety and wellbeing of all involved that you find a way to provide safe, 24-hour care.
Try to identify the root cause
Sometimes, it’s not dementia that causes the anger, but the inability to verbalize other triggers or factors. Knowing some of the most common triggers can help identify them – or avoid them –reducing anger as well as the frequency and intensity of angry episodes.
Some of the most common triggers leading to an angry outburst include:
- Hunger or thirst
- Lack of sleep or poor sleep habits
- Physical pain or discomfort
- Not taking medication as prescribed (or suffering from medication side-effects)
- Sensory overload (is the environment too loud, chaotic, confusing, too bright, etc.)
- It is their “worst time of day,” (perhaps they need soothing/coping mechanisms)
- Confusion (maybe you’re speaking too fast or instructions/sentences aren’t making sense)
- Heightened emotional states in others (those with Alzheimer’s and dementia can have heightened sensitivity to the emotions of those around them)
Identifying and addressing these issues can go a long way towards soothing your loved one.
Remain as calm and compassionate as possible
Not easy to do, this tip is one of the most important. Your calm, slow and reassuring voice, gestures and actions (moving them to a quieter space, turning down loud volume controls, dimming the lights, etc.) de-escalate the situation. If you are unable to do this, take some deep slow breaths, or a time out (assuming the patient is safe/secure where s/she’s at), and see if someone else can relieve you for a bit.
Re-think your relationship
Often, caregivers do a great job of soothing – or not triggering – their clients. This is because they meet the individual where they are, and form a relationship accordingly. This is quite different from the experience of a spouse, child, grandchild, etc. In your case, you knew your loved one as they were, and the person you knew may no longer be actively present as often (or ever).
One of the best things you can do for yourself and a loved one with your loved one is to meet him/her where s/he’s at at the moment. This frees them from the stress of “do you remember…” or your own hurt/anger if you aren’t recognized – even as that may vacillate from one day to the next.
Read our post, Connecting With and Caring For a Loved One With Dementia for heartfelt recommendations on how to create new pathways of acceptance and connection.
Seek support when reducing anger is a necessity
For some, this may involve the help of a professional therapist who can listen to you vent in a neutral space, and who can provide tailored recommendations to “arm your toolkit,” as you learn how to manage both the one who is venting their anger, along with your own complex web of emotions – including stress, frustration, anger, and even grief.
We also recommend joining an Alzheimer’s/dementia support group. In addition to commiserating (as well as laughing, crying and celebrating) with those who can personally identify with your experience, these groups offer invaluable advice and recommendations.
Prioritize Safety
It’s easy to prioritize your loved one’s wellbeing and ability to remain at home at the expense of everyone’s safety. However, this doesn’t do anyone any favors. Safety for the one you love or care for – as well as your own safety – must always come first.
Have a list at the ready of “first-responders,” who are willing to come at a moment’s notice if needed. If physical safety is at risk, call 9-1-1, and let the dispatcher(s) know that the individual has dementia and is acting aggressively. They will alert the professional first-responders, who are trained in how to de-escalate these situations with the least amount of threat or harm.
We Can Help You With Reducing Anger
Are you having a hard time managing the care required for your loved one with dementia as a result of his/her anger, aggression or violence? Contact us here at HomeAide Home Care online, or give us a call at 510-247-1200. We have decades of experience providing compassionate care for memory care patients.
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